Ruddy ducks and gruesome gorse.

Remember those darned Gorse bushes I had to hack at in an attempt to rescue ducks that didn't rescueing last week? Well this is what those spear like thorns do to a person

This is why I hate those bloomin shrubs - the spears are bad enough when they intially jab you but these after effects go on for days and hurt reeeeeally bad - did I mention how much I hate hate hate Gorse bushes?

Have to admit I am thoroughly fed up with these ducks now. To even catch a glimpse of them we have to sneak round to the pond as silent as a ninja, which is not easy considering there's gravel everywhere and we have to pass by a Great Horned Owl that hates people and makes a sudden racket if we dare to approach in clothes he doesn't recognise.
We usually get about a 3 second glimpse before the feckless ungrateful creatures head for the reeds and out of sight. Well I had a plan to help reduce that - remove half the reeds!

Sounded like a good plan until it dawned on me that I am the only one with the time to actually get in the pond and do it. It should be done every year really but last year we didn't do it at all because we were sulking after the Otter ate all our fish!
Here's the reeds that act as a hideout for Daphne (formally Jasmine - I got the name wrong), Donald and Daisy

It's worse than it looks because that only shows a bit of the pond.
So I bravely donned Mr TGs waders and slipped into that conga eel infested pond trying desperately not to think of all the creatures eyes that were on me just waiting for their moment to pounce.
Have to say I was very grateful for the lack of rain lately because it meant that the deeper areas of the pond were only chest height and there was no swimming required.
2 hours were enough in that pond for me in one hit. There is plenty more that needs pulling out because the far side reeds still cover half the pond but 2 large areas were trimmed right back (gotta leave some for the ruddy ducks)

I left the reeds over the decking areas to dry out and as a peace offering for all the eels and iguanas that may happen to have got caught up in them, but then I realised the decking is rotted and I could very well be going through it when I collect the reeds up - great!
So basically these ducks are boring - seriously boring! And I am still determined we need a Goose though I would settle for a Peacock!

First line of defence - chickens!

The fish in Mr TGs pond were extremely active yesterday - a highly unusual sight for this lot. From early morning till late evening they were chasing a particular Goldfish around like a posse of mad men, this flurry of activity though caught the attention of Saffy, our Birman cat.

Now before y'all go "Ahhhhh what a beautiful puddy cat", beauty is as beauty does and there is nothing beautiful about the antics of this cat. Bought as a house cat along with her sister they were the cutest kittens we'd ever laid eyes on - too cute even for here cos you'll lose yourself in their cuteness. Oh ok, here's the cuteness, but don't be fooled

Drunk cat and Devil cat.

Anyway these cats turned out to be THE most destructive house cats I have ever had the displeasure of owning - they could (and did) strip a house of its wallpaper over night. They also had a killer instinct second to none that saw them bringing back live rabbits to the house, thankfully these were wild rabbits, not someones prize Angora 'Mr Squiggles' rabbit - see where this is headed?
Anyway, like I said the commotion in the pond got the attention of Saffy and twice I had to run downstairs and chase her off the garden - though chase is hard to do when the cat just lays on the floor and wants you to rub its belly!
The third time this happened, I chased Saffy off but saw her lick her paw, that's when I realised she'd actually been dipping into the pond the entire time. I figured I'd remove her completely (No, not kill her!) and then let the dogs out cos she'll steer clear while they're out.
So there I am carrying her to her sleeping area in the shed, telling her off while she looks all cute and stupid and then I almost stepped on a ruddy Goldfish! The little moo had snagged the biggest fish, carried it round the garden, dropped it at the shed door and gone back for more - typical senseless killing from a cat.
I dropped placed the cat on the floor and picked up the rather dirty Goldfish which surprisingly started flapping away in my hand, so I legged it back to the pond and held it in the water figuring it would die anyway but nope, it started gulping, then flapping and then sped off.
It didn't look too agile, in fact it looked drunk as a skunk as it banged into things and kept laying on its side and I did feel terrible for it when the rest of the fish resumed their chasing of it. I did consider taking it out and putting it elsewhere to recover but then I figured while it's being chased it doesn't have time to think about dying - logic!

It's the big Goldfish in the middle being mobbed.

Poor thing!

I watched the fish for half hour or so (ssshhhh, I didn't admit to that) but it seemed fine so I decided to work on defences because the cat was surely going to come back now it knew what to expect!
I decided on a two pronged tactic, the first line of defence being a posse of hens led by the notorious 'Big Momma' who was up on a murder rap a few months ago (reduced to manslaughter on grounds of diminished responsibility) and head Honcho 'Romeo' who's name is deceiving.

Should Saffy make it through this first line of defence I had back up installed on the garden in the form of 'Atlas' who is a bit doddery now and prefers to ignore the cats but has done enough chasing in his past to warrant a reputation

And Huntly who would most certainly enjoy capturing a cat and forcing it to be his best friend cross dribble cloth

Suffice to say the fish were safe for the rest of the day because Saffy is too lazy to access the pond via the other 3 unmanned garden fences and as for that fish, well it's still alive - amazingly. once the water had cleaned it the scratch or teeth marks from the cat are evident but by the end of the day it was whizzing round as easily as it was before Saffy played tag.

On a relevant note, I decided I hate the pond, it's not big enough or deep enough and that next year the whole thing is being re-done. Mr TG agreed - of course!

Garden overhaul

The Cauli's and Cabbages planted in the polytunnel are still getting eaten by slugs (I haven't got around to putting down cardboard yet) so I was quite surprised to find that the ones outside in the raised bed haven't been touched at all.
I do keep them covered with fleece to keep the butterflys off them but surely that wouldn't deter slugs?

Here's a glimpse of the extra land to the side of the house that we're thinking of adding to the existing garden. There's as much of it as I need but as you can see it needs a whole lot of work and extends way out to the right and far behind me.

That ground is about 3ft deep of hardcore so any planting would have to be in raised beds, grass would be viable if we lay a good layer of top soil first.
The back fence does have a line of Willow trees, these are usually shallow rooted and don't last very long in our winds so we dug out a trench all the way along the fence first approx 3 ft deep to the soil below. The 6ft willow were then planted into that and the trenches filled in with soil, this means that at least 3ft of the trees are underground and should therefore stay upright.
Still that's gonna be a lot of work if we go ahead.

Remember when I said in my last post that Mr TG and I were discussing what water feature to add in the pond? Well I was thinking along the lines of this

http://www.retaildisplaysandprops.com/custom_nature-themed_environments.htm

Ok more realistically this

http://www.waterfeatures.co.uk/nh.html

Basically I would have liked us to build something where the water runs off slate.
Today though I left Mr TG to his own devices and I thought he was working on "his" patch of land that he's been clearing but nope he'd been erecting this

Excuse the foreground mess it's waiting for decking to be erected but that piddly fountain is everything I hate about garden water features. Some people can make them look great but the wind we get here makes that kind of 3 tier fountain pretty pointless.
I'm currently convincing Mr TG that we need to collect some of the humongous rocks we have and make it look nicer than just an oblong with rocks round it - hard work though, bless him he thinks a water feature is a water feature is a water feature so it could take some time.

With the first half of the garden requiring only minimal work now - mainly decking - I can get onto to the second half once the dogs have their own area finished.
This is the current state of some of the bit to do

It's full of weed and it's been made worse by the fabric we put down under the gravel. The weeds had no problem growing through it and even self seeded in the gravel itself, this image only shows the grass weed but honestly, it's a mess.
All the Pink and Blue is Aquilegia, one plant that self seeded over and over again and is now more of a weed than a plant - but it's a pretty weed so it gets to survive one more year.
There are some nice plants in there such as a Rhodi, Hosta, a hardy Fuchsia, Dogwood, Cranesbill etc but I'm looking forward to getting to grips with this second half later in the year.

Willow water and unknown pond bugs.

I am determined that this final attempt at Fuchsia cuttings will work. After my last attempt following the advice in my age old Fuchsia book I appear to have lost most of the cuttings - I may be lucky and have about 40% alive.
So this attempt is something I've never tried with Fuchsia cuttings though I do it with Hebe cuttings all the time - plonking the little blighters in water.
To add a little twist I added tiny willow cuttings to one of the pots of water, I've read on the internet that Willow naturally contains a plant hormone that stimulates root growth (which is why willow is so easy to root in a bucket of water) and this hormone is leached in to the water when actively growing willow is cut up and soaked in water. So that's what I did with one of the containers - I added cut up willow to the water and made a lid that enabled me to poke the cutting through to the water below but keep the leaves free of it.

Willow added to the water.

Ingenious lid (cough) that keeps the cuttings safe.

I know I haven't labelled the cuttings but tbh I've taken them so many times (with nothing to show for it) that I pretty much know them by leaf type, so in that pic I have 'Hawkshead', 'Paula Jane' & an unknown trailing variety. I also took some 'Ellebel' and a hardy unnamed one that I've had for a few years (actually one of the few I've managed to grow from a cutting).
I also took some of the cuttings and put them in a pot of plain water plus I stuck some straight into compost - none of them are in the heated propagator this time, I've put them in unheated ones in a shaded area of the polytunnel (I'm much more likely to keep a good eye on them that way).
Now I just have to wait and see.

I just had to take a photo of this Londons Pride. I've only ever really glanced at the flowers, just assumed they were pretty white dainty spray like flowers, nice but meh!
Then for some reason I actually decided to look at them properly, have you ever had a good look at them? They are quite simply the most dainty, pretty, painted like flowers I've seen in ages

Aren't they just so pretty!

Now I'm wondering if any of you pond lovers can shed any light on this bug? It's teeny weeny and stays on the top of the pond. They zoom round like bugs on speed and never ever stop, we've never seen them eat anything or anything eat them but there's loads of them.

Please excuse Mr TGs typical builder finger lol.

Mr TG finally has some fish in his pond. I've transferred a few plants from the main pond - Marsh Marigold, Water mint and a Lily that I have a feeling may be too big for it. Mr TG then added some kind of weed that I have no clue what it is and what it's actually going to do. Mr TG put it in there so he can be responsible for whatever it does!

I've just started finishing the end of the pond. I wanted to make a beach effect with us living by the coast and this is by no means finished.

The container to the right has a Gunnera planted in it so that should grow really large - the ones by the main pond are anyways.
The pebbles are from the garden and the local beach and I was aiming for the Saxifrage to look as though it had spilled out of the urn so we'll see what happens once it's actually started to grow.
The pond is due a water fountain but there's debate about what it's going to be - I don't really fancy a fountain in the middle of the pond, I'd rather have some kind of stream trickling down the side. The jury is out on it (our likes are very different) but one day I'll show you the very large formal 4 tiered water feature Mr TG dragged (it was concrete) into the middle of our natural, odd shaped mini lake - it looks odd to say the least!

Bunk bed trellis

I think that Spring may just have sprung and today has been glorious, a tad windy but not on the back garden and that's all I cared about really.

I was supposed to spend the day sowing Parsnips, sowing other veggies and planting out the Leeks but the wind round at the polytunnel was quite high and I didn't fancy fighting fleece in the wind so I spent the day in the shelter of the back garden.

I got a trellis up next to the Pergola. It's a bit of a weird trellis though. Originally I wanted to use an old bunkbed frame coming off the actual pergola but I decided I wasn't risking sinking a post into the ground without knowing where the pipes underneath are.
My alternative idea was to attach the metal frame to these posts which I only had to sink into the ground a few inches

It meant that the trellis would be free standing as opposed to attached to the pergola but I really wanted to get something up, I was getting impatient to get the climbing rose actually climbing something.
This is the finished trellis (well apart from sawing off a few inches from the top of one of the posts and adding a finial to both) and here is Mr TG's opinion of it

"All you need now is the horse"

Yes, it does look like a horse jump Mr TG and yes I would love the horse to go with it, thank you for the offer!
The rose is still in a pot at the moment because it's growing so well I daren't disturb it but it will definitely be in the ground next year.

I must show you the current state of Mr TG's pond though

Mr TG is apparently leaving it to see at what point the water level stops going down, this is supposed to give him some idea of where the leak is!
He checks it regular but it's still going down - what I haven't actually told him is that I use the water to water my garden plants pretty much most days, well I figured we'd be emptying it anyway to sort the leak out so it wouldn't matter.
Am I going to tell him it stopped leaking ages ago?  Erm nope, especially after the horse jump comment.

Anyway I don't care if it looks like a horse jump, once all the plants have grown up and filled out you'll not see much of it anyway

Now then, do any of you have a foolproof way of growing Fuchsia from cuttings? I try this pretty much every year and out of hundreds of cuttings I probably have a grand total of 4 that have taken.
I've tried big cuttings, small cuttings, lots of leaf, hardly any leaf, heat, no heat and this is how they all seem to end up

I need help guys and a sure fire way to get Fuchsia cuttings to take.


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Pond dilemma's

*Update*
I've had a couple of private emails after the post below asking me why I am so hard on Mr TG. I guess it's difficult to share the humour behind the words in a blog post (least I obviously can't do it) but I felt I should just let people know that I am truly grateful for everything Mr TG does for me in the garden. The sarcasm in posts is simply how Mr TG and I roll, if you spoke to him he would be just as sarcastic about some of the "monstrosity's" that I have created over the years. There is no malice intended from either of us and we are in fact an effective team usually - honest!
I think perhaps I should get Mr TG to do a guest post one day on his thoughts - if I dare!
But just so you all know - Mr TG ROCKS! :)



Well so much for good weather over the last few days - it's been cold and windy and we even had hail storms thrown in today - Great!

Anyway I thought I'd give you an update on this pond we're building but before I do I need to give you an inkling as to why I'm so dubious to hand over the building of it to Mr TG - I'm glad it's not my project anymore don't get me wrong but I still have reservations.
Basically a couple of years ago I asked Mr TG to build a waterfall into our natural mini lake. We had all the rocks required to make it and the effect I wanted was as if the rocks had naturally fallen into the lake and that the water had found it's way through naturally - get the idea?
Well we talked about this vision for ages, I made completely sure that Mr TG knew exactly the look I was going for then I left him to it.
You can imagine my scepticism when I noticed the very first tool he went for was his spirit level (typical builder) and I knew then without a doubt I was not getting that natural rockslide I wanted - and I didn't! The finished job was spirit level perfect and looked so ridiculous even Mr TG agreed it needed demolishing (his only saving grace).
So, with that in mind you can probably imagine my worries with the pond in the garden, but still I explained to Mr TG that although we were using rocks (not the look I originally wanted) I still wanted a scattered look NOT spirit level straight.
here's Mr TG's interpretation of that

Look at those lovely ruddy straight lines!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I also asked for them to hang over the liner so as to hide it a little - doesn't look like it's hanging over the edge to me!
Oh and also did I mention that I forget to check the liner for holes before we laid it? Well, guess what - I forgot to check the liner, and guess what else - it leaks! That water was right the way up to the top when we filled it up a few days ago, it's level is going down by the hour - oops!
You may wonder what the rocks are doing IN the pond (the pond leaked before the rocks were put there btw), well apparently Mr TG decided to make some bridges for the "fish to swim under". The mind boggles - maybe we should sort the leak out first Mr TG!

To get my head round the pond and what I'm going to do to it I decided to go and play in the polytunnel - what a mess there was in there

It's getting pretty dire in there now with so many plants needing to get planted out

I did give it a clear up though and it's now much more workable even though there are 40 or 50 plants in there that desperately need to go out

Much better!
Now I just need some nice decent weather to make some pergolas for the garden using an old metal bed base I scrounged - it'll look great trust me!

Humble pie

Yup, humble pie doesn't taste so good but today I had to eat my share.
Let me explain, I have made quite some noise lately to Mr TG that the new pond on the new garden is to my specifications. Mr TG offered his thoughts and ideas but me being me I stuck to my idea because that's what I had drawn up on my plan - NO deviation from the plan people!
Today I found myself digging out for the sleeper edges with a hand trowel. I kid you not - a hand trowel!
I was half way through this tedious task when I suddenly came to the conclusion that sleeper edges were going to look naff - well the idea of a wood coping on the top was naff anyways.
But what was the solution?
As much as I hated to admit it I knew we were going to have to go with one of Mr TG's ideas, the idea that I ridiculed and suggested he keep his ideas to himself because I had a plan.
Sheepishly I approached Mr TG and explained my dilemma and he agreed to drop his own project and help me get the pond back on track (he made me grovel for it first though I assure you).
Course, him being male and all meant that he couldn't just do what needed to be done - oh no, no no, he had to moan and state "I told you so" numerous times and just for kicks he made sure I was well aware how much he was helping me as he wallowed in mud which apparently wouldn't have been there if I had listened to him in the first place.

Here he is digging out, it doesn't quite pick up the self righteous gloat he had plastered on his mug but you get the picture

The pond is actually deeper than it looks, enough to house a couple of fish anyways. I've handed the pond over to Mr TG now cos I've had enough of it!

It's that time of year when the local farmers are busy with the lambs in the fields behind us and usually I get quite fraught when I hear the farmer whistling their dogs because our feckless pooches tend to go ballistic along a fence they could quite easily jump over if the fancy took.  We now have a fenced area that they can't get out of though so it was nice to actually watch the farmer at work with his dogs, lord only knows how much training it must take

The farmer once asked me if I would give him a hand to move his sheep with our German Shepherd because our dogs barking was preventing his dog from working. Course I jumped at the chance and jumped into the field with Atlas who often shows a tendency at the fence to want to eat the sheep.
I couldn't believe the difference in Atlas when he was actually in the field with the sheep though, he was petrified of them. We managed to get the job done but I was so embarrassed how Atlas wanted to drag me away from the sheep every time they moved. Least I know he'd probably never attack them!

He thought he was helping.....

This is the second day running where I've headed outside to get on with the garden, lasted 30 minutes and legged it back indoors because it's soooooooo cold out there.
I'm very fortunate that I have the opportunity to garden all day every single day if that's what I want and I always feel bad if I've let the weather dictate to me or I'm having one of those Blah days when I simply don't want to garden. Luckily I am a crafter too and I love making cards or making and building things for the home almost as much as gardening so with one of my daughters recently having moved out I have a bedroom to redecorate, a room to turn into a craft room and a room to turn into an office - busy, busy busy!

Back to the garden though.
I'm glad I held off planting out the veggies and flowers that are waiting in the polytunnel, the new growth on the flowers would most definitely have suffered with this cold wind and I don't think the veggies would have fared any better.

The new pond is the area we're currently constructing on the garden, although Mr TG still fails to see my vision of the finished product.
The pond will be edged by sleepers and the liner will go over the top of the sleepers and then I'll fix some kind of coping to the top, Mr TG does not get this and I'm not sure whether he genuinely thinks it won't work or whether he's being deliberately awkward - I suspect the latter to be the truth.
Thankfully Mr TG began the digging out for me and I did suggest that if the soil he digs out is good that he could put it on top of the newly manured area, saving me barrowing some from further afield.
I left him to it and when I returned this is what I found

What you're looking at there (from the bottom up) is part of the pond dug out then the darker manure Mr TG laid for me, the next paler stuff is the soil from the pond and then you can just see the darker soil I've been laying to the area.
Now does that paler stuff look like good soil to any of you? Anyone?
Is it just me or is it blinkin obvious that it's clay and that Mr TG has just dumped a pile of crappy soil onto my garden beds? Not only is it crappy clay but it's the exact same stuff that I've been diligently removing and/or improving to that exact area for the past few weeks.
Arghhhhhhhh!!  Grrrrrrrrrrrr! $%£DFGH&THMM(&^%$$

I kept my cool though and simply politely suggested that he dump the rest of the stuff elsewhere....if he knows whats good for him.

Here's the pond partly dug out

It's nowhere near deep enough yet and I still have to put 3 edging sleepers in but you get the idea - I hope! Mr TG doesn't though!
That pond soil is now pure clay and it's going to be very difficult to get out but the pick axe will help - hopefully!

With nothing else moving along outside I decided to take a piccie of a new flower popped out in the polytunnel. Say hello to Iris 'Pastel Charm'

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